I have been thinking about what I am going to do for Lent and tonight after an hour of prayer in Church after work and listening to God, I have decided to take a major step in the right direction. I have for many years wanted to fast, but never had the will power to do so. I’ve been living a disjointed and disordered life with little direction in it since I left the Monastic life. One of the things that I learned from my experience in the Monastery is that I do so much better living life in an ordered manner according to a Rule. Tomorrow I am going to create my first Rule of Life outside of the religious life and set up a common rule for how to live a Christian life. I will have set times for going to sleep and waking up in the morning, I will set times for the Liturgy of the Hours 2 times a day with the Angelus at noon. I will also be setting up a schedule for fasting and daily mass. I believe this step is necessary for me. Most nights I stay up to 1-3am wasting time on the internet or watching movies and it is literally killing me. It is time for a major change and I truly believe that the only way to grow in holiness at this point is to detach myself from my own will and weaknesses and reply solely upon Christ.
Please keep me in your prayers… I will need every single one. They say that the road to Hell is paved with good intentions.. I think I have put down about 10,000 of ‘good-intention’ paver’s myself. This time will be different and with the grace of God.. I will succeed.